Black Sunday

Raise your hand if you had Darren Sproles as the #1 RB after two weeks. I don't know why Yashar cut bait so quickly.

For some of us, Week 2 was an absolute disaster. Injuries ravaged the EFFL top to bottom as superstars bit it left and right. Jamaal Charles, AJ Green, RG3, DeSean Jackson, Knowshon Moreno, Mark Ingram, Vernon Davis, Eric Decker, Tavon Austin, Ryan Mathews were ALL injured on Sunday and left with their status up in the air. That is an unbelievable rate. There's nobody left! It's brutal. So many people were pissed off at fantasy football this weekend. It makes you question whether it's all worth it.

But these weeks happen. We'll move on and things will get better. This is the exception, not the rule. The good news is that the league has yet to see a Woody victory. A combined 0-4 is surely a reason for celebration. The Eagles came through on Monday night to salvage an otherwise awful week.

I must say at this point that one guy who has truly grown on me over the past week is Adam Schefter. Nobody has been more connected to and pissed off with the NFL at the same time. Clowns like Peter King are still slurping Goodell, but Schefter is truly fed up and speaking out about how terrible the NFL has been. The fact that he's on ESPN, which will show you mostly everything you have no interest in to get ratings, is even more impressive. There needs to be more people with influence like him not afraid to challenge the status quo. Goodell needs to go, and he could be the leading voice.


Beef of the Week: Trade offers

What the fuck? I fully believe that the league has formed a coalition to not trade with the Pylons, but I just don't understand the logic. In every trade, you have to give something to get something. EVERY TRADE. I've heard far too many times about "untouchable players". "Yea I like Gronk, but I don't wanna give up X, Y and Z." Why would I want to trade my good player for your scrubs? I just don't get it.

Maybe things will change with all of the injuries right now. But there is such a thing as trades helping both teams. I'm sick of this "I don't want to make a trade unless I know I'm getting the better end of the deal". You know who I'm talking about. No championships.


I really don't have anything to say about Peterson. I wore his jersey as recently as last Sunday. The only thing I guess to be questioned at this point is how many kids does this guy have?


Power Rankings:

Some good news! We have a new league member bringing up the rear of the rankings. Let's see how long this lasts.

14. Bo$$town Cutter (0-2) (Last week: 13): Can't really say that this was unexpected. Put up 67 points in week 1. Defense put up 28 points and the entire team still only had 88 heading into Monday night. Brady is a bad fantasy QB. The Fleener, Gore, Cooper trio starting every week isn't going to help. And it's possible that both Lacy and Alshon are not healthy. The bench is barren. At least Emmanuel Sanders is decent. Must hit the waiver wire immediately or make some trades to have any shot at the playoffs. It's only 2 weeks, but it's close to panic time.

13. Tweeting in the Trenches (1-1) (Last week: 12): Geno 911 took one look at your roster, and his team logo was the result. RG3 is injured. You're starting Aaron Dobson, Sproles and Zac Stacy. Left Gates with 34 on the bench, and you somehow still won. Way too much dead weight on this roster, but you do have some good players. Sproles could end up being the steal of the draft. Plus Welker should be back soon. Not as bad as Cutter, but it's pretty bad.

12. Geno 911 (1-1) (Last week: 11): As is frequently the case with this team, an ugly game and moves down in the rankings. Scored 86 points, including a 33 spot from Jimmy Graham, and it wasn't enough to bail you out. Sure Moreno and DeSean got hurt, but it's not like you have suitable replacements. Shonn Greene, Donnie Avery and Terrance Williams could all be in your lineup. That's just bad. Keep piling up the garbage though.

11. Pork Chop Express (1-1) (Last week: 14): Out of the basement! I had you higher, but the Mark Ingram injury hurts a lot. As we've thought all along, you did fine in the first couple rounds of the draft, but as the buzz set in, things went downhill. If Eric Decker is out for awhile, it could be tough sledding for a couple weeks, but your team has certainly proven to be not as bad as some others. I think ultimately you'll avoid the costume.

10. The Smokin' Jays (0-2) (Last week: 10): Why is your team logo a picture of Jay Cutler attached to Miley Cyrus' body on a wrecking ball? I really don't think your team is THAT bad, but Jamaal Charles' injury could end up hurting big time. The rest of your roster is OK, but it's definitely among the weaker in the league, hence the ranking. Rashad Jennings is going to end up being a steal, but like others, don't expect your defense to throw up 20+ each week.

9. Team Toliver (0-2) (Last week: 7): This is what happens when the 49ers don't play well. Put all your eggs in one basket, and it did not work this week. To make matters worse, Vernon may be injured. The good news is that for Pierre and Woodhead, both guys in front of them were injured, so things could be improving. But it's going to be tough. If Tron doesn't put up 30, it's gonna be tough each week. Kaepernick is not the same as having Peyton.

8. DA BEARDS (2-0) (Last week: 9): Bragging about starting McFadden and Asiata, it somehow worked. Now threatening to start 2 Jets RBs in the same week. I just can't figure out your draft strategy after Rodgers and Beast Mode. I really think your team is worse than a number of the teams below you, but superior managerial skills bump you up temporarily. You've played 2 cupcakes in the first two weeks. Let's see how things go when you play stiffer competition.

7. A Lot O' Tatz (2-0) (Last week: 8): I'm not suddenly going to think your team is good. You have absolutely no RB, which you seem to be OK with. Your receiving core of Wallace, Hilton, Roddy and Golden Taint doesn't scare anybody. But you should remain reasonably competitive with Peyton and Julius. Basically if Peyton gets shut down, you lose. Not a bad wager, but you should have some supporting cast.

6. Dueling Pylons (1-1) (Last week: 2): This week's biggest decline, the real Pylons team remains a virtual unknown. Put up over 150 in the first week and couldn't break 60 in the 2nd. This was the Pylons worst week since 2006. In fact, since 2006, the Pylons had not scored fewer than 79. It's just a loss and move on. But there is still talent here despite suspensions. Things certainly can't get worse, and has had to deal with some solid opposition. Currently in flux.

5. Big Brother's Bitch (1-1) (Last week: 6): Moves up as a result of the Pylons embarrassing week. Right around the top tier of teams. Not really doing anything wrong, but not proving yet to be elite. Pierre Garcon will be better, and it looks like you should avoid disastrous weeks. I really don't know what to expect, but should be in playoff contention all season.

4. The King's Crusaders (0-2) (Last week: 4): It must be difficult to be 0-2 and so high in the rankings, but the quality is there. Teams have just unloaded on you in the first two weeks. Left a ton of points on the bench, but I'm sure you'll get that sorted out. As I've said previously, probably the best Top 3 in the league, so you'll be in it every week. But it may be time to try and get some additional help (I know you've tried). The issue with your secondary players is consistency. That's it.

3. Stanky Monkeys (1-1) (Last week: 3): The fantasy gods rewarded you for your patience with an opponent who didn't break 60 points. If Matt Ryan and Seahawks defense again combine for just 8 points I'll be shocked. I'd keep rolling the same guys out there. It'll work. Brian Quick actually looks pretty good and could turn out to be a huge pickup.

2. Team Bartholomew (2-0) (Last week: 1): The first time Team Bartholomew has been knocked from the top perch, this really is due to the AJ Green injury. I still have full faith in your roster. Vereen and Wright will be better, you got nothing out of AJ and still broke 120. Could throw Jeremy Hill in fresh off the bench. You'll be good every week, but in the short term things may be a little more difficult. You'll be at or near the top all season.

1. Tequila Party Gnomes (2-0) (Last week: 5): Took offense to my comments and proved me dead wrong. You don't belong in the conversation with Gambino. What a find Delanie Walker was, but even without him still tore it up. Gio is looking like a threat to be a top 5 RB and Foster is going to get the ball until his body breaks down. Cut Dwayne Bowe and don't look back. The temptation isn't even worth it. You were drunk and rubbed your hand over the Sammy Watkins sticker at least 4 times to ensure it was stuck on the draft board. Use him. This is the team to beat in the EFFL right now.


Week 3 Matchups

#1 Tequila Party Gnomes (2-0) v. #5 Big Brother's Bitch (1-1)
#2 Team Bartholomew (2-0) v. #9 Team Toliver (0-2)
#3 Stanky Monkeys (1-1) v. #13 Tweeting in the Trenches (1-1)
#4 The King's Crusaders (0-2) v. #14 Bo$$town Cutter (0-2)
#6 Dueling Pylons (1-1) v. #10 The Smokin' Jays (0-2)
#7 A Lot O' Tatz (2-0) v. #8 DA BEARDS (2-0)
#11 Pork Chop Express (1-1) v. #12 Geno 911 (1-1)

Best of luck to everyone in Week 3. Hopefully we all make it through without injury.