We are roughly a third of the way through the 2010 EFFL season, and the league is totally wide open. An interesting fact: In week 4, teams combined to score 1058 points, or an average of 105.8. This is the lowest total scored in the league since we expanded to 10 teams. 5 teams are currently within a game of each other for the final two spots. Every game is so critical. As indicated in last week’s recap, Week 4 brings about a great opportunity in the league. It’s a virtual “knockdown” week with 1st place playing 2nd, 3rdth, 5th playing 6th. playing 4 All this is going to do is jumble the middle of the standings even more. Teams that have started off well are not safe, and teams that have started off poorly aren’t out of it by any means. Let’s get into what down in Week 4 before I go on a rant with wild week 5 predictions. I must say it is not nearly as fun writing these not hungover.
**** Week 4 Recap ****
Tequila Party Gnomes 121 – Coach Janky Spanky 108:
One of these teams finally has their first win, and I am much happier it is TPG than EEB. The Gnomes really caught their stride in the 4 o clock games with huge efforts from MJD and EEB prodigy Zach Miller. The dynamic backfield duo of John Kuhn and Justin Forsett was not enough to get Janky Spanky out of the hole. The running back situation is a total mess, and with Cutler putting up negative points, this team really had no shot to claim the win. FACT: No team that has started 0-4 has ever made the playoffs in the EFFL. It’s an enormous hole to climb out of. Kudos to TPG for stepping on a team when they are down and doing what is necessary to win. Matt is the 2nd highest scoring team over the last two weeks so this definitely looks to me to be a team on the rise. It appears this team will be on the shoulders of Joe Flacco for the long haul.
The King’s Crusaders 81 – Johnson’s Farm 77:
Barf. The last time a team won in the EFFL with 81 points or fewer was all the way back in the 2007 playoffs when again the King took down Lou in the semifinals 78-75. Far too many teams this season have had strong showings and come up empty for this to happen. If you remove your kicker and defense and you score only 55 points you should be absolutely embarrassed and be part of a public league shaming. Maybe something like this. I knew Nick was a lightweight, but it has become clear who the league needs to keep feeding alcohol at subsequent drafts. It has given everyone a leg up. This team has gone from bad to worse. The King? One impressive week, one terrible week, and two decent weeks. If this team can get healthy, they could be dangerous down the stretch.
Dueling Pylons 120 – Stanky Monkeys 112:
After 4 years of waiting, the Pylons have finally taken down the Stanky Monkeys. This ends the league’s longest winning streak by one team over another. If not for a Vick injury the result may have been different, however DeSean Jackson was mostly ineffective the entire game. For the second straight week, a Manning to Collie 4th quarter TD was the difference between a win and a loss for the Pylons. The Pylons have been cruising the past 3 weeks, however only one win has come easily. Over the past 2 weeks the Pylons have allowed the 2nd most points in the league. These teams have had a huge reversal of fortunes. It was just a week ago that Lou had 2 of the top 3 QBs in the league. One trade and one injury later and you’re left starting David Garrard. Tough break. After this game the Monkeys declared that the Pylons are the best team he has ever seen at any point in the EFFL. Shocking to hear, but surely this will inflate the Pylons ego.
The Stone Masons 144 – Tweeting in the Trenches 90:
The Masons still have not scored between 79 and 144 in a game. This team is completely like night and day. It does appear that the Broncos receivers could be here to stay, and it was just 2 seasons ago that Eddie Royal was a vital part of the team’s success. It wouldn’t surprise me at all to see this team rip off a couple wins in a row and get right back into the hunt. TITTY has so many boom or bust players that this team is a constant threat, but at this point they look like a borderline playoff team at best. Fusco is holding onto his players like grim death, and refuses to admit players that are busts. If he had the same team 2-3 years ago his team would be amazing, but this is not the past. Classic moves of an old timer. He may be balding quicker than we all had believed.
Animals With Eyepatches 105 – Maybe This Time 100:
This game did not live up to its billing as game of the week, but after 4 weeks Jimish has the only undefeated team remaining. Likewise, no team that has started 4-0 has ever missed the playoffs. This is a great sign for Jimish who has already matched his entire win total from last season. Sam could be in some trouble despite sitting at 3-1. Losing Steve Smith to injury and having to face the bye weeks may be difficult, but I think this is a talented team that can get some wins when needed. I definitely think this is a better team than last year. The Eyepatches are going to be a threat all season long and should be in for very few down weeks. Congratulations on still being undefeated Jimbo.
**** Week 5 Preview ****
Coach Janky Spanky (0-4) v. Stanky Monkeys (1-2-1):
These are the two lowest scoring teams in the league. Last week each team set season highs for points scored, but neither team has broken 112 points in any week this season. Pathetic. Lou has to have the least intimidating team I’ve seen in awhile. EEB’s is not much better but at least he has some breakout potential. Last year these teams met twice and in both of them neither team broke the 100 point mark. This includes a 95-78 Stanky Monkeys playoff victory. Yes, dating back to last year Janky Spanky has scored 461 points in his last 5 games (92 per game). First to 100 wins? EEB also traded away his highest scoring player this week, so I think that does not bode well for his chances. I’m picking the Monkeys.
Dueling Pylons (3-1) v. Maybe This Time (3-1):
How do you get out of an 0-4 hole? Trade aforementioned highest scoring player to league juggernaut. The Pylons now have the #1 scoring QB, RB, WR, and TE as well as the #2 scoring RB. That means absolutely nothing for this week’s game. Maybe This Time is certainly no slouch either as both of these teams have been in the top 3 in scoring virtually all season. The last time these teams met was quite the battle. After facing weak opponents all season and being ripped in the blog for it, Sam needed a victory in the final week to secure a bye. The playing for nothing Pylons dropped 150 and prevented that from happening and certainly cost Sam some money. I look for her players to exact some revenge this time out, and despite being projected for almost 180 points this week, I think the Pylons come up short in this one. Having to root against Adrian Peterson on a Monday night game is like torture.
Tweeting in the Trenches (2-2) v. Johnson’s Farm (1-2-1):
Ugh. And before we go any further, yes every Johnson’s Farm review must begin with a one word sentence expressing my disdain for this team. And that new poll on the league homepage? I’m the one who voted for you. Yes, I said it. Lifetime the Farm is under .500, yet this team has never missed the playoffs. It absolutely baffles me. TITTY meanwhile sits at 2-2, and this is an absolutely critical game to have early in the season. A loss will have Fusco right in the huge mix of teams in the middle, but a victory here could solidify this team as a legit contender. I just don’t see it happening. I think after a monster week from TO and Nicks last week they fall short, as well as Moss on Revis Island. Nothing about either roster really impresses me or strikes me as dangerous, as these are two of the bottom three scoring teams in the last 3 weeks. I’m picking the Farm. It pains me.
The King’s Crusaders (3-1) v. Animals With Eyepatches (4-0):
This is a game that I’m very interested to see. After looking very strong through 3 weeks, each of these teams fell a little short last week in the points scored column. Luckily it didn’t matter for either team. This week I think things could get a little rough for the Eyepatches. Having Delicious Mendenhall and BMarsh on a bye is definitely going to hurt, as well as a still injured Moreno. All but 4 players combined are playing at 1 o clock on Sunday, so this will most certainly be a tense 3 hours of football. These teams always have high scoring games and despite the handicaps each team is facing, I expect more of the same. I think CJ Spiller absolutely explodes this week and shows why he was a top 10 draft pick. If I know one thing about football, it’s that you must put your faith in the Bills. They never steer you wrong. I couldn’t have possibly imagined Jimish being 5-0 to start the season, but I’m picking him here. I don’t see any of Chris’ players putting up a monster week, and I think that’s what it’s going to take to win this one.
**** GAME OF THE WEEK ****
Tequila Party Gnomes (1-3) v. The Stone Masons (1-3):
Interesting fact. 5 of 10 teams have broken the 120 point mark twice this season. Those 5 teams are all members of the evens division, and that includes these two teams. Over the past two weeks the top 5 scoring teams also are all members of the evens division. This game earns game of the week status because neither of these teams can really afford to fall any further in the standings than they are. Each got a critical win last week to get out of an 0-3 hole, but there is still work to be done. There is not much history between these teams as they have only met a total of 7 times in 5 previous EFFL seasons. These meetings however have been extremely, extremely close. Here are the margins of victory in the history of this series: 6, 25, 4, 3, 6, 11, 4. This game could come down to Monday night, and I’m sure TPG will be on edge for the entire excruciating performance from Jon Gruden. I think the Gnomes running backs will be too much in this game against 2 lousy run defenses.
Well that wraps up another 2,000 word essay. I think after this week we will see a lot of teams grouped together right at the edge of the playoffs. It’s certainly going to be exciting and good luck to everyone.
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